Billets pour la catégorie Revue de presse :

Vocabulaire de la crise

Ce n'est pas que ce ne soit pas stupide, mais ça soulage. (dédié à Zvezdo, as usual).

CEO : Chief Embezzlement Officer.

CFO : Corporate Fraud Officer.

BULL MARKET : A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.

BEAR MARKET : A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.

VALUE INVESTING : The art of buying low and selling lower.

P/E RATIO : The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.

BROKER : What my broker has made me.

STANDARD & POOR : Your life in a nutshell.

STOCK ANALYST : diot who just downgraded your stock.

STOCK SPLIT : When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.

FINANCIAL PLANNER : A guy whose phone has been disconnected.

MARKET CORRECTION : The day af ter you buy stocks.

CASH FLOW : The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.

YAHOO : What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for.$240 per share.

WINDOWS : What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Yahoo@$240 per share.

INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR : Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.

PROFIT : An archaic word no longer in use.

trouvé sur le net, relevé par Le Nouvel Economiste du 13 novembre 2008

Gaffe

L'amour chez les invertébrés.
La punaise déprimée prend un verre; le barman mille-pattes tente de lui remonter le moral:

— Je sais pas moi... Tiens, t'as déjà pensé à l'échangisme?
— Je viens de me faire larguer, vieux. Tu veux que j'échange quoi?

Claire Bouilhac, Fluide Glacial n°44, p.83

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